In no way is my life perfect, no matter how much I fake it. My bank account has less money than anyone would think. Less than anyone could imagine for me to have. I act and look privileged, but I am nothing but a socialite that is hanging on to every last dollar. It’s sad really, how confusingly simple my life is. I have no idea of why I am complaining, I have everything that I need, but nothing that I want. I am the person that you see leading a fabulous lifestyle, with no bank account to back up why I live this way.
Needless to say, I am incredibly stressed about money, I believe that there is a plan for me, and that God provides…. But how am I not to stress? I am stupid, self conscious, nowhere near as attractive as I make myself out to be, annoying, and fabulously wasteful.
I spent most of my life wishing/pretending to be someone that I am not, for what? Everything has fallen into my lap thus far, I have never had to really work for anything. Good grades, jobs, material possession are all mine to have when I want. but nothing really matters.
Insanely pointless and terribly scattered.